The Conundrum

"Life's what you make it." Who said it, what does it mean? I don't know, I'm saying it because he said it and it sort of helps unravel my current tiff. Ermh... Yeah.. It's a... I... You know what let's start from the beginning. I'm at a crossroads. This isn't your regular crossroads though. More of a cacoon than crossroads really. I'm in the middle, facing multiple exits. So I'm here thinking, everybody gets two, why don't I get two?. Two would be so much easier to choose from. How I ended up in the middle?? Well I fell. And I hit the ground hard. Might have broken a bone or two. I guess that's life's reality check or something. I don't know but I definitely felt the reality. And that's how I got in the middle.  Right, the crossroads, how do they offer any sufficient or represent something in life.. allow moi to elaborate. It starts in church. I'm standing, sitting, clapping you know; that's standard procedu...

To be or not to be : Starring sweet cheeks and Jimmy. A story about heartfelt love, friendship, the friends zone, struggle and how a nigga fucked up his chances at achieving happy ever after .... Or did he?? Must Read. It was one of those days you know, those super boring days where the suns scorching for no fucking reason ; those days and then Jimmy saw her and was like wooow. I gotta talk to her.. After his slightly failed effects, he sort of gave up and came to the conclusion that he was never gonna see her again.  About two weeks past and Jimmy is going about his day, as usual and spots her with his course mates. His heart begins to pound. He thinks to himself, "what the actual fuck is going on?.... I'm going to be sharing a class with you for the next two years."  So he goes up to her and tries to hit her up. And just like that Jimmy and sweet cheeks became friends... Hmph.. just not long ago these two were total strangers... #mysteriousways . They had con...

 Why am i here? I'll save you the question. Let me tell you, point blankly, exactly why i'm here. Alright facts, I am here because I have brutally murdered 25 people (which is clearly not enough as my present state doesn't show a lesson learnt but rather people not getting the message) and subjected a countless number of people to an immense degree of pain through torture, mutilation, suffocation, scalping, you get the idea right? Essentially I am here because I am your average psychopath. At least that's how the media has skillfully portrayed people like me. You see they've told you about how I had mutilated all those bodies, how I had hung his body upside down and lacerated his skin as the blood dripped slowly out of his body till he was merely a lump of flesh, how I had excoriated her with the kitchen knife, how I had mutilated him with his own limbs, oh now that one was funny, you should have seen the look on his face and how he squirmed and struggled in vain, ...

Now I don't really know what you are expecting but you can keep them to ermh..well with whom or wherever that's not me...no offence.. now let's begin.. it was a cold and sunny..(yes cold and sunny because the British weather is unique and stress-fully annoying that way) Wednesday morning...well if you consider 2 in the afternoon morning..well it's morning for me anyway. So as I laid in the tub, looking to the ceiling, it hit me(not the ceiling, just to clarify) :"why do people care about what others think of them?"  Is it because they feel that their perspective of them will change immensely? Or maybe some of us are hypocrites, apprehensive of our slowly deteriorating facade as we are slowly being exposed for who we really are. I think the lot of you are just major ass kissers. That's why people's opinions concerning you matter to you. I mean a high recommendation is allowed. Constructive criticism? Why not? But c'mon...I swear I have the strangest...

There are these brief moments, moments of weakness where I doubt whether there is a God. And it's wrong. I mean I pray and something happens but what about the times that I am on my knees, in tears, looking to the sky asking for a sign. Huh?! This world is, it's designed in such a way that if you're not strong enough, you descend from predator, to prey, to nothing. I tell my mates about it and they're like, hey, even Job went through pain. Correct but there's just one thing wrong with that sentence. I am not Job and I will never be him. I'm me. Not everyone has to go through pain. I don't believe that. Not everyone has to experience some kind of tragedy before they can testify that they're in Christ. But what I don't get is why. You work and work and work and all that effort yields no results. Why can't anything go the way we want it to. I struggle to see the point to all this. Just when you think you cannot be brought down... Shit happens. It ...

There are situations that happen to each and everyone of us which is sometimes unexplainable. Those moments that leave you shaking your head. And I don't know if it's just the universe playing with my life but these things happen to me on a daily. So here's a little, well a little crazy situation I faced last night. So I'm busy on my bed watching civil war again because it's the coolest movie ever and my roommate tells moi that he is going downstairs and that I shouldn't touch his bed. Obviously this came as a shock to me cos I'm no where near his bed and I would never touch his bed. I just brush him off and say, "whatever dude." Later this Nigerian douche bag comes to me and starts accusing me of touching his bed. Frankly that's soo kindergarten so I laugh and I'm a patient guy but I also have limits. This dude starts blabbing about how his has made peace with everyone and how I'm trying to destroy that. At this point I just don...